Insane Clown Posse: Weak-Ass Bitches Or Still Down With The Clown?

Prior to the explosive success/ridicule/confusion spawned from the 2010 video release for their song "Miracles," when I would see ICP symbols such as the flaming clown face or the little running hatchetman, etc., the folks sporting such icons consisted of teenagers, dudes with anger issues long-repressed by the conforms of society, and good ol' fashioned white trash tweakers.  I used to think of violent, stupid people, because frankly, that's who liked ICP when I was in high school.  (However, for the record, I have met and rocked out with several Juggalos in my adult life and found many of them are friendly, good people).  When I see these symbols now, my mind goes right to the "Miracles" video (thanks to the Internet's viral ingraining) and I smile, considering how amusing it is that it appears that ICP have softened up.

There are diehard fans that shun them for their suddenly apparent relaxed take on life, and others are loyal to the core no matter what.   But really, have the ICP duo, Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, gone soft and weak with lyrics and style that pale in comparison to their original "horrorcore" genre they have become so famous for?  I ask this because of what I have just discovered today.

From the same album that "Miracles" came from, Bang!  Pow!  Boom!, comes another track called "Juggalo Island."  I'm not kidding.

Personally, while not as bizarrely "where-the-hell-did-that-come-from?" different and funny as "Miracles" is, "Juggalo Island" is no less pleasant and welcoming.  In fact, it has the same level of positive "fuck yeah!" vibes as "Miracles" does and is equally "toned down" in the way of swearing and graphic imagery, which is what comes to mind more readily when thinking of ICP.

Alright, so I keep talking about their recent stuff and only make small reference to their older, more graphic music, so what's a good example?  I'll be brief, this is just the song, no video, and it's "tame" as far as some are considered, but you'll get the idea:

Insane Clown Posse - The Dating Game

Obviously, saying things like, After your mom does the dishes and the silverware / I'd dry-fuck her till I nut in my underwear, is a fair degree edgier and harsher than, And we all in / A free ballin' / See me shore-side surfin on a dolphin, wouldn't you agree?

This all can be poked back to the accusation/assumption that after "Miracles" was released, many fans and non-fans were like, "What?  Bitches be gettin' all weak-ass religious an' shit!" or something to that effect...  But despite the sudden tone-down on their most recent record, I would have to say that toning down isn't the right description for it.  I'd say they grew up, and figured out a better way to express what they're trying/been trying to get at for the last twenty-two years of their existence.  Yes, ICP has been around that long.  I know, I was shocked, too.

Regardless of what it looks like now, and ICP has said this publicly; they've always held these religious ideals and levels of appreciative morals towards how to live life.  In the words of Fire Marshall Bill, LET ME SHOW YA SOMETHING!

Based upon their cumulative album-based mythology of The Dark Carnival, there is a cloaked concept of parallels akin to a religious mainframe.  By the way, did you know that Violent J created this mythos out of a dream he had about a traveling carnival?  Insert "The More You Know" shooting star in your brain now.

So all Juggalos are hoping to learn from their evil ways and get to Shangri-La, and don't want to go to Hell's Pit.  People, Heaven, and Hell.

Juggalos reside within the Carnival of Carnage, essentially it's the ghetto and of course, what springs from the ghetto most often?  People who do bad things, but, if given a chance, could totally get out of it.  You with me so far?

The Ringmaster gets to decide who goes where.  God, I would definitely think.

The Great Milenko is this kickass magician dude who tricks Juggalos into doing bad stuff.  Could it be, hmmmmm...SATAN?

I paraphrased, but nonetheless, special thanks goes to Michael Senft for his lexicon guide from AZCentral.com.

So there you have it.  Toning down would imply to me that things have been purposefully neutered to appeal to a new/different audience.  And I don't think they've done that at all.  I believe "mellowed out" may be a better approach.  Or simply grown up.  Or, probably the most obvious point, one that I've neglected to point out until now:  Both ICP members are proud fathers, and their children are just now old enough to really experience and develop real facinations with the world around them.  

DAW, ISN'T THAT SCHWEET?!  

But seriously, folks, I say they're totally still down with The Clown.

Enjoy some Juggalo News.  Whoop!  Whoop!

P.S.:  While I do not consider myself a juggalo, I do happen to find ICP and the whole Juggalo mentality quite entertaining.  Just sayin'!

Trio's "Da Da Da" Song Revisited

Actually, the full, original title of this auspicious, nearly 30yr old track (from 1982, if you can believe that) is "Da da da, ich lieb' dich nicht du liebst mich nicht aha aha aha," the German portion meaning "I don't love you, you don't love me."  But of course, no one's going to call the radio station and request that mouthful, so "Da Da Da" will simply have to suffice.
      
Why the hell am I bringing to memory something that was created long before I was even a glimmer in my parents' eyes? It's simple, really.  Like most random tunes that pass through our ear canals into our brains to trigger thought patterns, "Da Da Da" is a song that, once you've heard it the first time, will inevitably sink into your brain and cement itself firmly for all eternity.  All it takes is hearing that beat on the old Casio keyboard just once and you are instantly brought back to the revival period of the song's fame, notably from a Volkswagon/Internet commercial featuring software super duo Bill Gates & Steve Ballmer that came out in the mid 90's.  You know the one.
   
I was perusing my music collection and I'd completely forgotten that I had the song.  It's memory triggers are so powerful, that simply reading the title of the file immediately zipped through my eyes, into my brain and down the information super highway until it pulled over at an old rest stop off of Memory Lane where a little girl with a Casio keyboard used to be such a huge fan of that damn two-tone beat demo button.
   
I used to love that Volkswagon commercial because I was so jazzed that the song in the commercial featured the exact demo tune that was on my keyboard that was given to me as a shipped-from-Thailand travel gift from a friend of my mother's when I was maybe 2 or 3.
   
The funny thing is, until just today, I never realized that the song did not in fact originate from the commercial, or even the 90's.  It was on T.V. that I first heard it, and due to the success of the catchy, repetitive-as-all-get-out beat heard in the commercial, I remember the song being played frequently on radio stations.
   
My bottom line to this post is that I suddenly felt inclined to see if there might be a music video attached to this oh-so-kitchy tune.  And to my fortune, there is a video.
   
A giant shoulder-padded blazer suit, suspenders, an umbrella, oblique, 80's expressionist European backdrop, and the totally awesome mini keyboard are all featured in this seemingly washed out, confused music video.  The vocalist stares blankly off-center from the camera at times, as though he could be reading cue cards. He also keeps pointing with his middle finger while he "sort of" does a bit of a dance, the drummer looks like what a robot might look like if it understood the human concept of boredom, and the guitarist is...wearing a lampshade on his head.


Oh, the 80's.

Source Code: Patriotic *and* Rebellious!

Source Code, starring a gruff, much more manly-looking (read: adult) Jake Gyllenhaal and an ever-sweet and perky Michelle Monaghan, spreads out the story of a soldier who is part of a project to jump "back" through a shadow of time to stop a terrorist.  It gently but interestingly mixes science fiction with that dramatic flair that patriotic films like to have and overall is quite balanced in its biases.

On one end, it's made very apparent that the military is doing everything it can to make the country a safer place, even at extreme measures of testing scientific realms that are still very much just theory and opinion right now--at least to the rest of the Average Joe Schmoe's out there.

On the other end, it explores issues surrounding the harnessing of those scientific realms in a very ethical sense.  We get to know Gyllenhaall's character pretty well from the git-go, we sympathize with his tension and confusion and his sense of urgency and curiosity.  Getting close to him, we see his side more intimately than the military's, and as an audience, it makes us see that those extreme measures the military takes to save millions can not only be questionable, but can also be unnerving.

One thing I particularly liked about this film was that it wasn't completely just about finding out "who done it," but it was about the main characters experience through this ordeal he is forced to repeat over and over again.  It adds to the film's depth, and in doing so, makes it overall more entertaining to follow the story.

Sadly, this film will probably be overlooked, because while there is the science fiction draw, it's made readily apparent that the military is not who you're rooting for, which turns lots of red-blooded Americans average moviegoers away.  On top of that, it's got a big fat red sign on it that screams "SCIENCE" which also tends to be a bit more intimidating than taking your toddler to go see a cartoon where you can mentally tune out while the kid's attention span is finally not fixated on you, food, or some other random object or person that requires you to be ever-mindful, even though you just got done working and still need to worry about grabbing that one thing you're out of that you need tonight or dinner will suck.

Point in short: Entertaining, thought-provoking, well-written, and blended with a few crazy explosions!  Yay!

And Soon the Darkness: More Than a C+, Less Than a B-

Generally speaking, this film isn't original, or kitschy, or bad, or great, but if you have the patience, it's decent as a one-timer film to sit down with.  Based upon a film made about 40 years earlier with the same title, (so we're talkin' remake...although the reason why isn't really clear.  This film simply doesn't stand out), And Soon the Darkness follows the story of two young, pretty, American girls traveling through Argentina (and despite popular belief that this would never happen, having actually traveled parts of South America myself, I can say that this is totally common and I saw plenty of American pairs of women traveling).  They decide to stray from a bike group and spend their last night hanging out in a small little town.  It's obvious that these girls are here to have a good time, and are given the awkward, almost pensive looks they probably deserve by wearing cute shorts and tanktops and not being able to speak very good Spanish at all and laughing quite a lot.

They go to a bar, one girl is more reserved and mopey about a failed relationship, the other just can't seem to stop from keeping a giant sign on her head that says "AMERICAN GIRLS LIKE TO GET RAPED" by dancing seductively to the Divinyls' "I Touch Myself" and giving everything that looks male a wink and a smile.  Of course, she's pretty trashed by this point, but from the git-go of the film, it's plain to see that she would probably do this sort of thing anyways, but maybe with a little less effort.  Meanwhile her friend just keeps texting the Ex and continues to look blue.  Oh yeah, and Drunk Ass actually tries to hit on one guy (an always-damn-good-looking Karl Urban) by walking in after him into the bathroom and being all like "oh, the women's bathroom was locked, oh no, tee-hee!" and tries to get a peek at him and then watches him while she pees.  Nice try, bimbo.

And then the film goes where you're expecting it to go and the girls are involved in a dangerous situation that could cost them their lives, or at the very least, their dignity.  Needless to say, the film got more interesting when the slut gets kidnapped, because then her screen time is significantly less and we focus on the less-dumb girl.

The acting is fine, the situation is very real and was carried out well, and the scenery alone is pleasant to see.  It's a bit slow at first, but like I said, once the idiot is gone, it gets a bit better, and there is a scene that is worth looking at just for the landscape.  It's an abandoned town which stands in ruins amidst a shoreline and has these really trippy twiggy skeletal trees that look like they came straight out of a "Swamp" card in a Magic the Gathering deck.

Most people seem to hate this film simply based upon its gratuitous, flat cliche storyline.  To me, it wasn't bad, it just wasn't special in any way, which many take to be bad and stupid.  Can't exactly blame them, but then again I'm much more generous to all cinema.  As the title reads: more than a C+, less than a B-.

Chuck Norris Controls Today's Theme

Random Fact Approved by Chuck Norris:  Chuck Norris's real name is Carlos Ray Norris.

Random Quote Chuck Norris Actually Said:  "I definitely feel I do have God in my corner."  --Chuck Norris

Random Photo Chuck Norris Endorsed:

Commentary Chuck Norris Accepts:  Rest assured that when not bracing himself against bear fu, Emperor Shang Tsung, or partaking in Medieval Times, Chuck Norris exudes his badassery to the extent that not even cheese grader toilet paper will faze his flesh.  A man so in tune with his inner steel resolve that the golden floors of his five-story Outpost of Reckoning soften like butter beneath his steps, forever imprinting his greatness.

News Chuck Norris Allows to be Told:   Polish folks honor Chuck Norris's birthday, for he is much better than a dead president that didn't like gay pride parades.  Former president Lech Kaczynski's death has been overtly boo-hooed by his twin brother Jaroslaw for well over a  year and critics are complaining its getting old.  So, the people in response to this, have decided that they can celebrate action heroes' birthdays.  They've also celebrated Steven Segal's birthday.  LOL, Poland!

What Chuck Norris Tells Us Can be Learned from Today's Post:  Chuck Norris doesn't need to breathe, the oxygen comes to him.

Today's Theme: Agh, Babies!

Random Fact: A blue female crab can lay up to one million eggs in a day.

Random Quote: "Babies everywhere!"  Go NutriGrain for successfully blending creepy with memorable.

Random Photo:

Commentary: Some people love to do pre-birth photos because it encapsulates the process of life itself growing and changing, developing into what the mother can only hope for will be the best.  And some people think that being naked in clown suspenders and pants is the only way to truly express that they can do whatever the hell they want to ruin that child's life with embarrassing photo memories in the future.

News Regarding Babies: "Baby Gaga" Ice Cream Lawsuit with Lady Gaga.  Ok, so technically it has very little to do with babies at all, but in my search for something current and baby-related, this caught my eye first.  It's exactly what it sounds like.  Using her image, where an obvious Gaga-esque figure is offering ice cream, it appears as though this may have been something she endorsed when she claims she didn't.  The man behind the ice cream wants to fight it, since he named the ice cream because it's made from HUMAN BREAST MILK and that's where the name's cleverness comes from.  This isn't the first time someone's tried this before (breast milk food that is), and even if he wins for not being accused of misrepresenting the celebrity's name, because in all honesty, parodies and other comedic jabs are completely legal, still, there is a big issue surrounding his ingredients.  Some people swear that it makes sense in the conservation and replenishment angle, some warn that you can get hepatitis from it, and the Soybean Mameshiba tells us that "breast milk tastes different at the beginning of a breast feeding session than at the end."  How do these folks know this? .... SCIENCE!


What Can Be Learned From Today's Post: Clown pants: DO NOT WANT.

UNICORNS: The New 'It' Sensation

Since the beginning of time, unicorns have been considered awesome in many cultures and revered for their succulent meats and life-giving quicksilver blood all across the globe.  They are loved by young and old alike for their representation of purity, prosperity and most importantly, their magical rainbow powers.

As the Internet continues to grow strong and ever-expanding, much like Cthulhu at an all-you-can-eat-Joe-Bob buffet, it's not about what's in the real world that's interesting and engaging anymore, it's about how hilarious that shit is on Youtube and how fast you think it'll become society's new favorite toy, sort of like how Justin Bieber has managed to slay the minds and hearts of millions of gaping-mawed tweens via viral attention which has ultimately launched him (?) into mega-super-wacky-stardom.

Despite the healthy and consistent love for unicorns as seen in video games, fantasy novels, comicons and the Rainbow Reverend Mother Lisa Frank, it appears that unicorns have become the new 'it' thing to love and to attract popularity.

I remember in February of 2010, a friend and I were surfing on the net.  Because who reads books anymore?  Don't answer that.  Anyhow, he was on Adultswim and found a cute little game called Robot Unicorn Attack.  We were like, "haha this is pretty awesome, I remember that song, I love that song!"  Because of course the moment you take a tacky pop track from '94 and connect it to a thing that you immediately like, the song becomes awesome. Again.  In fact, the song, "Always" by Erasure, gained its own resurgence of popularity, and sales for the album perked up.  Of course, no one cared about supporting the band, it was all about going, "IT'S THE ROBOT UNICORN ATTACK SONG OMG I WANT IT!"

Now, just over a year later, unicorns seem to be making more and more appearances all over the place.  T-shirts, adorable handbags, meme crossovers, webcomics, general buffoonery, holy-shit-that's-awesome artwork, and fan inspiration (whoever made this rules!)  But most importantly, and finally, the reason why I'm posting this rant in the first place, they've started showing up in music videos.

Thanks goes out to Joe L. for these first two gems of the internet!  The man is truly a unicorn at heart!

Ke$ha - "Blow."  Take that any way you like, but it is neither sexual or drug related--at least for the video.  It throws you off immediately, making you aware that mythical creatures are not only present but that also 'mythical' is an oxymoron since they say none were harmed in the making of the video, implying that unicorns are in fact real creatures that we love and respect.  Which they are so I guess that point's taken.  James Van Der Beek has a starring role alongside the popstar, and they are surrounded by unicorn-headed people in tuxedos...because it looks cooler that way.  

The best part about this for me was that someone has earned themselves two cookies for the nerdery  in this video.  1) Unicorns (obviously).  And 2) Creepy Horse Mask!  It's plain to see that someone was cutting budget corners by shucking out a few hundred bucks to buy bunch of the marginally internet-infamous creepy horse masks, paint them white and stick horns on them.  Seriously, go look.  Same damn thing, I swear.

Youtube's Serenading Unicorn performing in super awesome hand-puppet glory, Coolio's "Gangsta's Paradise."  If you aren't familiar with the Serenading Unicorn, you should be, he's adorable.  And he's a unicorn.  Explanation:  Juicy Fruit made some ads where a unicorn hand puppet lipsyncs to old popular tunes like Culture Club's "Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?" and Boyz II Men's "Just for You."

To add to these enjoyable tidbits of lolz, I decided to compile some moar unicorn stuff just for you!

Charlie the Unicorn - If you haven't heard of this then you don't know the internet.  Or you're Mormon.

Planet Unicorn - Animated series about a gay boy named Shannon who wished for a planet full of unicorns.

White Power Unicorn Tattoo - Possibly the most vibrant and bizarre form of Nazi expressionism ever.  Maybe.  Give it time.....oh, look... *sigh* yeah...that about does it.

Democrat's Rainbows and Unicorns - Republican ad w/ Obama and rainbows & unicorns.  Seriously.  Kinda.

Unicorn vs. Narwhal - Some guy 's CALarts school animation that speaks to us all...

Well, I brought narwhals into this, so here's an awesome toy set and Weebl's Narwhals video.  Just 'cause.

And although no unicorns are present, these are related, and worth watching.

E2 Angels' "Unicorn" - Video's pretty hokey, but the song isn't bad.  Sort of has an 80's vinyl tinny sound with a style reminiscent of something you might hear on a soundtrack made for goth puppies.  It gets my vote!

Team Unicorn's "Geek and Gamer Girls" - Well, apart from being called "Team Unicorn", this has nothing to do with unicorns.  But I just discovered it and thought it noteworthy. The song  parodies Katy Perry's "California Gurls" and throws in a ton of geeky references, as well as some notable appearances by Seth Green, Stan Lee, and Katee Sackhoff (she plays Starbuck in the recent BSG series).  It's cute and its lyrics are pretty clever but none of the girls known how to lipsync right--in fact all of their mouths are either too small or too big when they're singing their parts.  

Oh well, still entertaining!  

Confused and Amused: Vidja Ennartaynment!

So, I've recently noticed an upswing in discovering weird, hilarious, horrible random crap.  While this is not news to you, it is news to me, since I realized that my video cache has not only become fat and happy, it's also recovering from it's fourth triple bypass heart surgery from excessive lolz.  Honestly, I don't know how I find and watch all of this stuff without losing sanity points to the Great Devourer Lord Cthulhu--then again perhaps I'm just too damn peppy to get drowned by my own addiction for life-wasting media.  I'm sure only time will tell.  Anyhow, let's get to the subject at hand!

Megadeth - Hangar 18 -- In case you're not familiar with it, "Hangar 18" is the hangar in Dayton, Ohio where E.T.'s hubcaps are being stored after they were lifted off his space pod from the Roswell landing in 1947.  Magically, the video actually coincides with the song's lyrics quite well.  The band rock out in their leftover long, flowing 80's doo's (this came out in 1990), surrounded by the military bringing in aliens of all shapes and sizes, including one ugly cute one and one that has the body of a woman with some ghetto-Borg face mask on.  You do get to see a full shot of her bare back, but discouragingly, you only get to see underside boobage when you see that the makeup guys threw some "metal" things on her chest and called it good.  This video will take you back, and most likely make you shake your head.  Upside: you'll re-enjoy listening to songs like "99 Ways to Die."

Goldfrapp - Alive -- I love Goldfrapp, and yet I didn't know there was a video to this song, and when I saw this video, I lol'd.  Hard.  Needless to say, pretending you're Olivia Newton John performing "Physical" with a black metal rainbow twist is awesome.  And pretty.  In fact, it's pretty fucking awesome.  Imagine if Dimmu Borgir suddenly got a wild hair up their asses and decided to do Broadway.  Imagine if they took it one step further and had RAINBOW BLOOD!!!!  ...Watch the video already.

Kool Keith - Dick Towel -- Exactly as the name implies--but not as crude as you'd think it might be.  Or maybe my sense of humor is mutating like a 1950's spaceman: fast track to horrifying walking-talking cheese.  Anyhow, not only is this catchy, it's true to life, yo, so you best be appreciatin' what's doin', else I might have to get serious.  Did I mention that this is also an honest rap video?  Kool Keith, you get a phat cookie for this piece of genius.

Stjepan Hauser and Luka Sulic - Smooth Criminal -- CELLO FACE OFF!  No seriously.  Loosely, the video opens up with a guy looking at a girl and I think getting upset that she's with this other guy.  Quite quickly the video goes from them launching into a slow-mo-homo fight (cause seriously, anytime you take a fight scene and slow it down, it just looks like foreplay) and suddenly cutting to the two of them sitting across from each other and duking it out through their cello rendition of Michael Jackson' "Smooth Criminal."  Freaking awesome, and while some people say they're not as cool looking as Apocalyptica, who cares, they rock their instruments pretty damn well if you ask me.  And then the video goes back to the slow-mo-homo fight scene, and then the girl stops them. But the meat of the video is a savory dish indeed!

America's Got Talet - Busty Hart -- So, trying to look beyond the scope of this show's improper use of grammar (it should be 'America has' in case you weren't sure), sometimes, it truly has its moments where you say with a lackluster tone and a dry smile, "Yeah....*sigh* yeah....that's America all right."  What I want to know is how "Busty" figured out she could do this in the first place.  Did she trip at a BBQ party and land on the drink table?  Was she really hammered at a bar?  Did someone tell her to give it a try on a dare?  Who knows.  At the very least, she makes impressions wherever she goes.

I just facepalmed at my own joke.  Damn, I'm gettin' good at this here writin' thang!

Ajdar - çikita muz -- If you listen closely, what he is saying is actually what it sounds like.  The song is called "Chiquita Banana" in English, and it turns out the Turkish equivalent is very close. Well at least the "Chiquita" part is.  Why he is dancing with radishes in addition to several bananas, I don't know.  I do know that "muz" (banana in Turkish) rhymes with the Turkish word for ice, which is "buz" and the song has a lyric that is along the lines of "my heart will turn to ice without you" or something like that.   I think what can be inferred here is that the singer is calling the desired woman his "Chiquita" as a pet name.   So the next time a handsome Turk gives you a banana on a date, it's his way of saying he loves you.

Steklovata - Steklovata -- Tween boy band Steklovata are a cute little Russian duo who sing with groovy beats that make you bop your head like you're listening to a synth hip hop jam straight from 1992.  To complete the mood of the music, one of the boys is dressed like Vanilla Ice if he were five, adorned in a weird red and black shirt that opens across his clavicle at a diagonal angle, gold pants and a leather baseball cap that is, of course, positioned sideways, as only a true artist would ever see fit to do.  The other is wearing a Wrangler t-shirt and has a bright-eyed clueless sweet look on his face while he sings.  It's really precious.  I encourage you to take a look at their official website and check out the cute flower field banner!

Steklovata - Noviy Noviy God -- So good, you gotta have more.  This tune, definitely more Christmas-y (note the sweaters grandma bought them all for the holiday season one year), features two older, taller, creepy guys standing behind the now slightly older Ruski duo.  Everyone looks uncomfortable, but despite that, the music's cheery disposition has enough head-boppin' beat to make you feel like you're in a fluffy white wonderland full of gingerbread men and candy canes.    They sing awkwardly, one of the older guys shakes his head as if he knows how ridiculous this whole thing is, and the other one is near catatonic in his expressions.  Speaking of catatonic, I insist you watch the Swedish tribute version that four random dudes lipsync to amidst a similar background and equally similar grandmas's house-worthy sweaters.  The guy on the far left barely sings along, and by his expressions, its painfully obvious that this was not his idea and he's pissed to be there.  The others all have this peculiar look on their faces like they must have thought it was a good idea at the time, and when they finally went ahead and did it, they realized how bad of an idea it was--in mid song.  Totally made of win.

F.U.S.B.I. - Come On Back -- To end today's excruciatingly long (but I hope entertaining?) post, I give you this true gem.  The super happy Asian keyboardist, the beret-wearing bassist (who suddenly appears shirtless out of nowhere later in the video), Meatloaf's dad on guitar, and a big burly man wearing an American flag bandanna.  The tune is catchy in that "well, I can see they're really trying, but they're not there yet" kind of way.  They have only this one song and video, and a rather quiet facebook page which links to a site run by a guy who loves them so much that he's got a fund going for them to do another video.  There is much speculation that this is all a joke.  One line in the song goes, "Not a chance ("want a chance" ?) with you / I want to show you love / put myself in you."  After which point the singer takes one finger and shoves it back and forth between a circular opening of his thumb and fingers.  Based solely upon that (super happy keyboardist and shirtless bassist aside), I agree, it's gotta be a humorous ploy.  Regardless, it's totally worth hearing.  Do it now.

This concludes the day's entertainment!

Black Swan: I'm Such a Sucker for the Nervous Breakdown Movie

Having been a fan of director Darren Aronofsky (known for such films as The Wrestler and The Fountain) for a little while, I had been eagerly anticipating his newest film Black Swan, starring Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis.

Black Swan tells the story of a young dancer who seeks perfection in her art form and is confronted with a challenging role for a new ballet production that will smother her with the highest levels of pressure and stress from peers, her overprotective mother, her instructor, and ultimately herself.

The film's pacing was smooth and the story was focused on a primary plot line, which was thankful because we all know how confusing things can get if you throw too many subplots in a movie at once.  But this was simple: girl does ballet, gets role in big production, and the plot line revolves around her gearing up for this part, which is the climactic moment of the film's end.  Simple.

Sounds kind of like a sleep-fest don't it?  Ballet?  Seriously?  Well, yes, seriously.  Even if you have no desire to ever see a ballet performance in your life, consider the whole point of ballet: to be inhumanly graceful with the human form.  Human beings are not designed to stand on their toes.  They are not designed to plie (pronounced plee-ay) and pirouette as though their bones are hollow like several bird varieties.  In that way, ballet is an incredibly physically demanding activity.  You have to not only be light on your toes, but light in general, and since it's a profession like any other and everyone wants to be the best they can be, competition fuels nasty vibes between peers.

In Black Swan, we get to watch a standard of life not many of us could be accustomed to.  The girl's breakfast is half a grapefruit and a spoonful of some sort of off-color cream which is probably a type of almond butter for Pete's sake!  She has to see a physical therapist regularly, and in regards to the taxing work a dancer puts on their body, it's well known that you can only dance as long as your body can take it, and there is a constant pressure that once you're starting to pass your prime (i.e., out of your twenties) then you are no longer seen as ideal.

Through all of this, we watch the woman's mental stability begin to unravel, and the way in which it unravels is unique, symbolic, and while not everyone can relate to being a ballet dancer, her personal battles can still strum sympathy chords in a general audience because anyone who has had to battle with their own personal issues getting in the way of their goals can understand what she's going through.

To make things a bit more interesting through all of this slow descent into mental turmoil, there is a degree of surrealism within the walls of this woman's reality that is both fascinating and eerie.  I'd rather not ruin the movie any more than I might have already with what I've said, but keep in mind that Aronofsky's penchant for adding that odd touch to the palate of ordinary life is still fresh and well-thought out.

The cinematography was really well done and the characters were all genuinely interesting.  Things are not quite what they seem in the entire film, and just as a fair warning, there are some particular violent images that while simple, will probably make you cringe in that nails-on-chalkboard kind of way.

Bottom line: the whole movie was interesting, visually appealing, and the end was satisfactory.  But then again, it might not be for everyone.  As I said in the title: I'm a sucker for the nervous breakdown movie.

To lighten the mood of this rather cut 'n dry review, here's a Saturday Night Live take on Black Swan featuring Jim Carrey.  It r lolz.